I have a crush.
Totally unattainable as I’m so not his type. He wants that typical slim, petite, fair domestic Goddess that has been built up by Asian society to be the epitome of how Asian women should be!
I’m dark – not so much but by Sri Lankan definitions I am.
I am sick and tired of how you have to be fair to be pretty in our society! Why is that? Having more melanin apparently makes you that much more unattractive! Can you imagine how being told on a regular basis (basically at LEAST 4 times a month) that “If only God had blessed you with being fair – then you’d be even more beautiful.”? Gee thanks!! Way to boost a girl’s confidence! Maybe I should just throw this back at them. Maybe I’m this colour because God wants me to be healthy more than anything else! Have you ever thought about that?!
As a teenager, it used to bother me a great deal. So much so that I hated looking at myself in the mirror. Like maybe I had a very mild form of BDD but as I got older, I saw the nicer things I had to offer – I’m alright looking, being dark should not hinder the fact that I have a nice personality (I’m modest too!), I’m a gooood dancer, I’m smart and a lot of fun to be around! Ok, so maybe clutching at straws but I immersed myself in the life that I wanted, not that what had been dictated to me. I surrounded myself with good friends and one of the reasons I’m confident in my own shell now is due to B, my best friend (more about her later) and S – my ex. It restored my faith in human compassion and kindness – that people can be loved for who they and not for what they look like!
What pisses me off even more is I’ve seen some girls out there who are fair and they’re not ugly but they are so plain and similar as the next fair girl but I’ve seen dark girls who are beautiful and people just can’t see it. I guess it takes a “Darkie” to know a fellow beautiful one!
I have a crush.