Gosh, it has been a while hasn’t it? I haven’t had the urge to write. I mean, life has been on going – I have been doing things that are blog worthy but my heart hasn’t been in it.

A recap of Aug – Dec: I became unhappy at work – office politics will do that to people and it is a shame that senior management don’t understand.

I joined WW in August (in a bid to lose some weight before my US trip!) and currently am 17lbs down – I am a slow loser (in weight loss – a quick loser in life!).

As a result, I started a new job in October – with a company I have previously worked for. 3 months in and I don’t know if it was the right decision but time will tell.

November saw me travel to LA, Las Vegas and Yosemite National Park with my siblings. My sister’s boyfriend joined us as well on this trip – his first time abroad. It is funny how an extra person can change the dynamics so easily. I didn’t enjoy Vegas and LA so much – I’ve been there before and they are not cities that touch my heart. Yosemite was an amazing experience. We were lucky enough to get there before the snow started to fall and roads started to close so we saw all that we needed to see (including a bear!).

I moved out of home in early December – away from my parents and siblings. Not so far, 4 miles at most but I am still away from them. I see them a lot (every weekend). Working from home and living by myself as meant that I need to find other ways to get out of the house. What I have realised though, is that living by yourself is not all that it is cracked up to be. Cooking for one person continuously is a chore. Eating the same meal for lunch because of leftovers is not ideal. And they don’t sell things in the grocery store for one person! Though I am trying to learn new things to cook. What living by myself has taught me is that I like to learn – I am looking at recipes and trying things that I wouldn’t have had the opportunity to at home.

You might realise I left out September – purposely I might add. September saw O re-enter my life. It must have been a moment of madness. He had messaged me on an old Skype account and I replied. We spoke erratically. He asked to see me, told me he missed me and the spiel that I guess I needed to hear. We met up and old feelings stirred. He was everything he was in the beginning. In my head, I was screaming at myself “WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS?!”, but your heart does not always hear that. I know he did wrong by me. I know. And I know that I do not want to be the other woman. I have since put the final nail in that coffin. I know picking at wounds does not make them heal.

And now we are in 2017 – I think I am trying to love myself. It’s hard. I feel as though everyone I know has settled down and are living that dream of having a family and children. Some days I question, do I want children? Or is it because that is what is expected of me? Is there a reason why God hasn’t presented me with this opportunity? Would I not make a good mum? So much revolves around finding somebody to love you. Unconditionally. Most often than not, I question why that eludes me.



How long as it been?!

Oh gosh, it has been so long. Nearly two months. A quick summary of my life:

Two trips to the USA. The first incorporating Whittier, CA (a sleepy “city” where the highlight of my trip was being the only non-Mexican in a Mexican supermarket – so much fun!), Portland, OR (which has firmly become my favourite city (a whole separate post when I get some time!)) and King of Prussia, PA (to visit our offices and where it rained the whole time I was there!). I think I ate a years worth of food in the two weeks I was away this time round.

The second trip was just 4 short days to KOP where the sun shined gloriously until today (when I am about to leave!).

In that time, I have had one date. I had been speaking with this guy for like a month before we met up. In fact, I thought he was super nice considering he made the effort to text me every day whilst I was away and not once did he ask me for a “picture”. We met up shortly after I got back from my first trip away and I thought that it went rather well (just goes to show how much I know!). A few days after though, I could feel that he wasn’t feeling me – you just know right. So I asked him what the deal was, we’d been getting on well, he’d even kissed me so I wasn’t hideous(!). But he said, that it’s probably best that we don’t “see” each other. I will be honest and say I was slightly disappointed (because personality wise – we got on) but hey – if it wasn’t meant to be, it wasn’t meant to be. Better to cut our ties early rather than late. I deleted all traces of him from my phone book and phone.

Other random news – I dropped my phone whilst I was out here in KOP and it now refuses to turn itself back on. AND I am pissed because I never backed up any of my photos.

I return back to London this evening, where I will need to do some “laundry”, pack and then I leave on Wednesday again for India. This time for pleasure as my friend has her destination wedding.

This is clearly a filler post – I’m sorry that I have to subject you to these random writings! 🙂


So this trip here was cancelled! I was super sad because I’d arranged to see family whilst I was over there but I guess these things happen.

However, I have since been asked to visit Portland, OR and Whittier, CA – I am super excited. Portland looks incredible. I’ve never been and am really looking forward to exploring.

Any tips are welcome! 🙂


Work have just asked me if I want to go to Toronto. Hell yeah! My manager always asks me in such a way that he makes it sound like an inconvenience! What he doesn’t realise that I love the fact that I get the opportunity to travel at the expense of my job.

Toronto – let’s go! 🙂

I love my job!

I don’t know how many people can say that. I am not self employed and I don’t have a creative job. I work for a private company and I do it because it helps pay my bills (my aspiration is complete my Masters in Political Science and join the UN!).

But that said, when my job involves travelling – it can’t be all bad. This year so far I have travelled to Seville, Spain; Cadiz, Spain; Grenoble, France; Nancy, France, Frankfurt, Germany (twice!); and I will soon be travelling to Pittsburgh, USA and Los Angeles, USA. Not only is this great for my air miles but I am truly lucky to have a line manager that has confidence in me. Management that have confidence in me. Some of these places, I wouldn’t consider visiting as a tourist so business tourism is definitely a win-win situation.
Don’t get me wrong – it’s far from glamourous – living out of a suitcase 1-2 times a month. But it’s at times like this I am fortunate for everything I have and every opportunity I have been given.

In the word of the illustrious Drake “Started from the bottom now we here!”.

What’s That?!

Oh you want me to go to Perth, Australia for business? And you’re going to pay for it?

But I’ve only been at the comapny 4 months – are you sure?

Wow – this is a great opportunity – thank you!


(How amazing that I get to go to the other side of the world ofr work related activities?! I think it’s my time to shine!)

Start As You Mean To Go On

What can I say – I wasn’t the average person over the holidays but I didn’t lose weight. So being back at work has really given me the kick up the arse I needed. I lost 1.5lbs this week, Could definitely have done with that being a few more but it’s just given me the incentive to try harder. Maybe fit in a little more exercise. However, it doesn’t help when your boyfriend is stick thin with the skinniest arms and legs. Man – he’s so skinny!

Nor does it help when you have weekends and holidays planned! 2012 so far:

January – Brighton (for the weekend)

Febraury – Geneva, Switzerland (for 5 nights). I haven’t found accommodation yet though. It’s proving to be sooooooooo expensive!

March – Miami, FL, USA (for a week)

2012 isn’t shaping out to be too badly but then I am dating a guy who’s not the same religion as me so it probably won’t all be a bed of roses!

The ‘Dam

Some people know think that I am musically challenged. I’m also very unlucky at scoring tickets to concerts I want to see.

So when Take That (complete with Robbie Williams!) announced their tour dates and I found out I would be in Germany at the time they went on sale, I knew I had no hope but was optimistic nonetheless. Leaving strict instructions with my siblings to endeavour to get some, I thought this would be my time. But no. It wasn’t.

So when their European tickets went on sale, I said I was getting some and that would be that! And I did. I managed to secure 3 tickets to their concert in Amsterdam at Amstel Arena (Ajax’s football stadium which was enough in itself to excite me!). And then Take That went and announced more tour dates in Britain – my luck is so bad it’s not worth talking about.

However, Amsterdam 2011 was planned and I have just returned from what was an amazing trip (no illegal substances pun intended). There was a little scare when I heard this but thankfully Monday night RW stepped onto the stage and pretty much smashed the ball out of the park vocally.

TT were incredible. The show production was amazing and the atmosphere inside the venue was electric. There are no words that can do it justice.

But it wasn’t just the show. It was the fact that I spent 4 days with my siblings enjoying stupid jokes, eating crappy food, relishing the crap weather and watching Outsourced (which you must watch – I love Gupta!).

I will post some photos (not that I took many) but just a quick post to explain for the absence.

Coming back to work to a shitload of emails is the worst thing about going on holiday though!

25 Days in 2011

No not a new film.#

25 days annual leave a year is just not enough. 😦

14 – 18 July: Amsterdam to see Take That perform!

02 – 24 September: Sydney, Australia via Kuala Lumpar, Malaysia (4 nights).

Total number of days taken: 20. 😦 And that’s not even thinking about all the ad hoc holidays I’ll need!

(I’ve already started scoping out where the best places to party are but all suggestions are welcome!)